BBC News is reportedly “shocked” to discover that snow exists, planting poor reporters in various areas of the UK all day in the freezing cold.

“We’ve put reporters on the sides of motorways across the country to report all day on this strange phenomenon” said BBC News spokesman, Ira Torie, “they won’t get to have a warm drink until at least the 6pm news”.

BBC reporter, Nida Bettajob, told us “this white stuff falling from the sky is very cold, and it joins the other white stuff already on the ground. If I stamp on it really hard, it also goes really slippy.”

“We need to stay out here to let people know that this stuff is happening in Chippenham and Norwich, and provide slow panning shots that this white fluffy stuff is not just the area around me on camera, but in fields around me too.”

“Wow.”