Cockroach spokesman confirms title for Prime Minister after she survives yet another no confidence vote by the skin of her teeth and is actually gloating about it.
19 votes saved the Prime Minister last night, 10 of those paid for with £1.5bn, so the cockroach collective have come forward to announce they are handing the title “Queen Smarm of the Roaches” to be enacted upon the apocalypse – or Brexit, whichever comes first.
Eww von Clickclick, Roach spokesman told our reporter today “it’s well known that the only things that will survive the apocalypse are cockroaches and Twinkies. Now we can add your Prime Minister to that list after last night’s performance.”
“The fact she gloats about it as if she easily walked it, didn’t pay for half the winning votes, and didn’t have literally every MP who wasn’t in government voting against her is remarkable and makes her truly an honorary cockroach. Hence, she shall be named Queen Smarm.”
Mrs May was unavailable for comment, as she was too busy telling everyone who would listen that Jeremy Corbyn was a dick.